Pregnancy Problems: Trusting and Paryer

First I would like to apologize to my readers, it has been a few weeks since my last post. (That sound like a catholic start to a confession. BTW I am not Catholic.) The time has gotten away from me. You can say I have suffered from topic block.

In one of my last posts I had announced that I am expecting again. I told you that I would share about the pregnancy problems.

The ups and downs of this pregnancy so far has been a journey. It has not been taken alone I had to lean on my Lord for comfort and my husband when we go through news I do not  want to hear.  Plus, I think, well I know I am way more emotional than I was with my son. I am currently 23 weeks knocked up (over halfway). Our bundle of joy will be here in May!!!23-weeks-prego-mackenize

Let me start from the beginning of this with the miscarriage I had experienced in August 2016. With a miscarriage your whole mind set on pregnancy changes. I knew he/she was in Gods hands and God had protected me from the pain that comes with a miscarriage.

There was still the emotional pain. I would think to myself what is wrong with me. Why did my body reject life? I would also look at someone that was pregnant or had a baby and judge them. I would instantly feel guilty because that is not what God wants for me. People would try to comfort me and tell me their stories of miscarriages. It was helpful and I knew I was not alone.

To be truthful I felt God in my time of sorrow.  I did a lot of praying during this time. I would think about the woman of the Bible and read about some of them. Hannah stuck out to me. She prayed for a child. I was determined to do the same.

Me and my husband want to continue to try and pray over our future children.  Sometimes I think about the child that God has and said to myself that child does not have to experience the pain of this sinful world.  We put all our focus on our son that just turned two. I said to myself that my son is still here with me and God is trying to mold me in to the mother he wants me to be.

Spiritual Inspiration: Photo on imgfave:

When I found out I was expecting again I was fearful. I never got back on lady cycle and I thought maybe my body was play tricks on me. So I took a test and Plus sign came across as soon as I pee on it. The next day I called the doctor they got me in for blood work really fast. The test showed that was about 8 to 10 weeks along. Then they scheduled me for a 6 week ultrasound. There I seen the new life growing and she was active. My heart was filled with joy.

At 11 weeks I had another doctor’s appointment. They told me that I had a subchorionic hematoma. I did not know what this was so I Googled it.

Google said:Subchorionic hemorrhage (subchorionic hematoma) is the most common sonographic abnormality in the presence of a live embryo. Vaginal bleeding affects 25% of all women during the first half of pregnancy and is a common reason for first-trimester ultrasonography.

I was part of the 25% of women who experienced bleeding and it freaked me out. *I am going to be a little graphic. I woke up in a pool of blood and my first thought was this is another miscarriage. I was not ready to go down this road again. I woke up my husband and I was already in tears. He calmed me down and prayed over me and the baby.  I put my trust in to God and handed it over to him. The bleeding quit and I called the doctor that morning and they explained what was going on. I was relieved!

I was still paranoid so I invested in a Fetal Doppler so I can hear the heartbeat. It was the best thing to have. I watched a YouTube video to know how to use it.

The moment I thought we where in the clear we get another trail to journey through. At our 18th week appointment we find out that we are having a girl and I have a condition called Placenta Previa. I need reinsurance again. I was like why was it so easy with my son and every-time I go to the doctor there is something else wrong. The doctor told me to take it easy and no lifting over 25lbs. He also said when I get worried to check my pulse and tell myself that I am still alive (I guess that was a little bit of doctor humor that I did not find funny).

When I got home I googled it…

Google said:Placenta previa risk factors include a previous delivery, age older than 35, and a history of previous surgeries, such as a cesarean section (C-section) or uterine fibroid removal.

The main symptom is bright red vaginal bleeding without pain during the second half of pregnancy. The condition can also cause severe bleeding before or during delivery.

Bed rest is recommended. A C-section is often needed.
I have put this in God’s hands. He has kept me healthy and lets me know my baby girls is still there by active moving in the womb.
The struggle I face is not being able to pick up my son and carry him all the time. I still show him love by kisses and hugs. When I set down he climbs on my lap and we read a book or watch a TV show together.
Sometime motherhood is tough and is unpredictable. I know I serve a God that is loving and cares for me as a mother. Whatever happens next in this pregnancy I tend to lay it before God with trust and prayer.
God, help me be more conscious and consistent with my life.  Amen.:
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